Purgatory
by goingstealth
Summary: In the aftermath of Holy, life has slowly returned to normal. But is normal something that those who've led lives of adventure can adhere to? | Prologue + first 3 chapters are now up!
1. Prologue

She stood at the door, twitching nervously. She wanted to reach out and use the knocker but her senses were screaming at her to run. Her flame-red hair ran down her back to the swell of her hips in knots she hadn't taken out. She'd been so stressed about today that she had completely forgotten and only now was she thinking of the state she must be in. Finally steeling her courage, she reached out for the knocker, only to be thwarted by the door swinging inwards. Before her stood a woman, almost a whole head shorter. Her thick brown hair was filled with streaks of grey, her deep brown eyes studying the stranger before her.  
  
"Can I help you love?"  
  
"Uhm. I'm looking for a Reno Lyngley."  
  
"He's in the back. Wait a moment, I'll just go and get him." The older woman turned and walked down the hallway. She stood in the doorway talking to someone out of sight. Voices drifted down to Dione as her stomach churned.  
  
"Bright red hair, just like mine used to be? You sure?"  
  
"Of course I'm sure Reno. She's stood at the door right now, looking like she's having kittens!" she said, turning to face Dione with a smile of reassurance on her face.  
  
"What does she want then?"  
  
"She didn't say, she only said that she was looking for you."  
  
"Christ woman! I've made more than enough enemies in my lifetime! What if she's here to kill me?"  
  
"Reno, I do believe you're getting paranoid in your old age! Just go and talk to the poor young thing, or will I have to make you?" She leaned forward, clenched fist held in front of her whilst a menacing grin slipped upon her face.  
  
"Alright, I'll do it. just so I don't have to shame you in a fight woman!"  
  
"Hah! You, beat me, in a fight? You've never beaten me yet Reno!"  
  
With that, a new figure filled the doorway, a tallish man with grey hair and a slim figure started to stride towards Dione before halting suddenly, shock covering his face.  
  
Dione dropped the handbag she had been kneading between her hands nervously and ran forwards, throwing her arms around his neck.  
  
"Daddy!"  
  
The smile slipped from the woman 's face behind Reno, pure mortification replacing it.  
  
"Dione." Reno whispered, his arms hanging loosely from his side.  
  
Slowly she let go, stepping backwards.  
  
"Oh dear lord, I never wanted this day to happen." he said under his breath, but it was still loud enough for Dione to hear. With a choked cry, she span and ran from the house into the street, a flood of tears running from her soft blue eyes.  
  
Reno sank to his knees, his head falling; unbelieving of what had just happened. Arms slipped around his waist and he felt weight upon his back.  
  
"I'm so sorry darling. so sorry." she whispered.  
  
.oOo.  
  
A week later, Reno woke up screaming. Every night since Dione had arrived on his doorstep he'd had the same nightmare, always ending the same way - Dione slitting his throat and laughing all the time. He heard Tifa stir in the room next to him; he'd been exiled to the spare bedroom because of the afore-mentioned nightmares.  
  
He knew what he had to do. He had to find Dione and tell her the truth. But it was a truth he himself didn't want to share again. All these years of living in happiness with his wife were threatened by the arrival of his daughter. The daughter of his first wife.  
  
.oOo.  
  
AS dawn's first rays of sunlight crept in through the window, her arm slowly reached out across the bed to rest upon his chest but he wasn't there. Damn. I oughta be able to remember I made him move into the spare bedroom. Drawing her hand back, she felt a sudden shock of pain in her palm.  
  
Opening her eyes as she sat up, she saw a rose thorn embedded in it, the rose itself hanging limply from her hand and a note on her pillow. Easing the flower away, she sucked on the wound while picking up the note with her other hand. Reading it, she sighed and lay back down in the bed, the note falling from her grasp. "May the lord go with you Reno."  
  
.oOo.  
  
Darling,  
  
I can't just leave this hanging the way it is. I have to find Dione and tell her the truth. She deserves at least that much. I've gone to try and find her. I don't know when I'll be back but you can be sure I will be. I can't even stand the thought of being away from you. but this has to be done.  
  
With all my love, Reno -X- 


	2. In Search of Kalmer Shores

"Back off woman, that's none of your business!"  
  
"You have to talk about it to someone, why not me?"  
  
"Because it's none of your fucking business, alright?! I don't want a fucking sympathy vote!"  
  
"What happened Reno? What's so bad that you can't talk to me about it?"  
  
"NO!" he bellowed, throwing the vodka bottle across the room, where it smashed against a wall. Rising up from his seat, he made for the door before his legs gave out underneath him. Falling to the floor, his last thoughts were of her.  
  
.oOo.  
  
Fluid pictures swam before his eyes: gulls swooping through the air, occasionally diving downwards to snatch something from the azure sea; neon lights casting tawdry images in the dark night as the sound of raucous laughter carried to his ears; fire lighting up the gloom as dreams fluttered away on the cold breeze.  
  
Someone was poking him. hard.  
  
"Geroff." he muttered.  
  
The poking abated but when he didn't move again, it resumed.  
  
"I'm warning you."  
  
The poking increased in its viciousness, digging into the side of his ribs. His eyes snapped open as he threw his fist out, neatly catching his tormentor on the chin.  
  
Elena staggered away clutching her face, blood trickling through her lips from where she had bitten herself. "What the fuck was that for?" she cried, spitting some more blood into the sink she was now leaning over.  
  
"Sticking your fucking nose in last night, being a pain in the ass poking me and being a pain in the ass in general." Picking himself up off the floor, he tried to straighten out some of the creases in his clothes whilst praying for the hammers in his head to cease their infernal striking. "What time is it?"  
  
"Time to get your useless ass out of your deadbeat flat and into work Reno!"  
  
"My flat?" Reno looked around, realising it indeed was his apartment. His record collection lay strewn across the floor where he had left it before heading out for a night on the tiles, the same as every night. Every night since.  
  
"Wait a moment. how the hell did you get in here?"  
  
"I am a Turk y'know, I picked the lock when I came back this morning," Elena replied tartly, now holding an icepack to her chin.  
  
"You? A Turk! HAH! You only got let in on a pretence!"  
  
"You've cracked man, what the hell are you on about?"  
  
"Tseng let you in the Turks because he wanted to pretend he wasn't so into that damned flower girl. He only wanted you around so he could pretend to himself he wasn't in love with Aeris. Same reason he fucked you too; he didn't really want you, he just wanted a lie to reassure himself with."  
  
Elena said nothing, merely dropping the icepack and running from the flat, the door slamming shut behind her, making Reno wince in pain. Serves the bitch right, he thought, despite a tinge of remorse biting at him.  
  
He walked into the bathroom, a cesspit by his own reckoning, which meant it was truly disgusting. He flipped open the cabinet and took out a bottle of pills and some mouthwash. Taking a chug of the mouthwash, he swigged it about, gargling a brief tune to himself. Spitting it out, he turned the tap on and took on a mouthful of water. He fumbled with the pill bottle, finally managing to get the childproof cap off. Shaking it, two capsules fell out and he quickly dropped them in his mouth, swallowing. With a quick shake of his head, he placed the two bottles back and closed the cabinet, looking at himself in the mirror on the front. His eyes had red lines running through them where blood vessels had burst and his hair, a matching colour was drooping. He turned the tap back on but this time nothing came forth. Uttering an expletive, Reno kicked the pipe beneath the sink and stumbled away. Today is not gonna be a good day.  
  
Going to the cabinet in the living room, he took the pendant from beneath his dark blue shirt and opened it, removing the key. Dropping it to dangle from his neck, he unlocked the cabinet, pulling the doors open. From it he took two handguns, checking the sights on both before slipping one into his shoulder holster and the other in the one on his right hip. Grabbing a few clips of ammunition, he closed the cabinet, locking it once more. He took the locket and looked at it briefly before putting the key back in and sealing it. Tucking it back into his shirt, he opened the front door and left, a single tear rolling down his cheek.  
  
He took the subway into work, not trusting himself behind the wheel the way his head was still pounding. You didn't want to be bombing around Junon with even the remotest chance of losing your concentration. The roads were hell with the large influx of refugees from Midgar now using the roads as well.  
  
Standing outside the Neo Shinra building, Reno let his gaze wonder upwards as he did everyday. The wonder never left his head at the fact that this was a place of good, where he didn't have to commit such atrocities as he had done in his life. No, this was indeed "New" Shinra.  
  
Stepping through the revolving door, he winked at the cute secretary before walking past her desk to the elevator, pressing the call button. Opening his wallet, he took out a red card just as it arrived. Stepping inside, he pressed the button marked 65 and slid the card into a slot when prompted. Spewing the card back out, the elevator started its smooth ascent of the ivory tower. He whistled aimlessly to himself until, with a 'ping', the doors slid open and he stepped onto the floor he'd dubbed as Purgatory. His fellow tortured souls buzzed about, popping in and out of offices carrying paperwork with them. The Turks had undergone a major overhaul now that Reeve had assumed control. They were being cleansed, gaining redemption from their past sins by serving as a kind of Policia. No more were they the instruments of terror but the arbiters of justice, the architects of peace.  
  
He strode through the hallway, making his way to the office at the end of the hall. Knocking on the door, he heard the familiar voice say, "Come in Reno," before opening it and slumping into a plush black chair. The room's occupant didn't look up, his eyes scanning the paperwork before him, pen scribbling furiously until a few minutes later when he set it down.  
  
"Seen Elena?" he asked, turning to face Reno.  
  
"Yeah. I wouldn't be all that surprised if she don't come in today Rude."  
  
The bald man looked Reno in the eyes, his own invisible behind the shades he always wore. Reno alone knew why that was and he was hardly about to tell anyone. Despite having been promoted above him, Reno still treated Rude the same as he always had; a true comrade-in-arms. Someone who understood the burden he carried with him always. He would have been there if Reno hadn't insisted being on his own, and in a way, Rude was glad of that. He hadn't wanted to be assigned to the mission in the first place. It wasn't something anyone should have to do and it most certainly wasn't his place to carry it out.  
  
"Why's that Reno?"  
  
"She left my place crying this morning."  
  
"Did you.?" Rude left it hanging, the question all too obvious.  
  
"No, worse. I told her."  
  
"Shit."  
  
"Indeed. She left my place crying like a schoolgirl whose hamster's just died."  
  
"Ever heard of discretion?"  
  
"Uhh."  
  
Rude sighed, running a hand across his smooth scalp. "You'll have to apologise you know? Before leaving for Kalm that is."  
  
"Yeah su-- Kalm?! Why the hell would I be going there?"  
  
"Because I'm ordering you. You're to supervise the set-up of an office there which you will head."  
  
"B. b. but Kalm has absolutely no night-life! We don't need an office there! I mean Christ. there's only one bar there and that's run by." Reno trailed off, not wanting to speak that name.  
  
"That's the other reason I'm sending you there Reno. I'm worried about you. You're going to Kalm to settle yourself down. God knows it's time. It's been five years since--"  
  
"Four years, five months and thirteen days Rude."  
  
Silence descended over the pair, both uncomfortable with what they were glossing over.  
  
"So, you're going whether you like it or not. You need to get away from all this trash and sort yourself out."  
  
"What if I refuse?" he replied, anger, running through his eyes, his jaw clenched.  
  
"Then you're out on your ear Reno, and you know you'll be fucked then."  
  
"SHIT!" From outside the office, both people heard a lot of items hitting the floor in surprise at the fierceness in Reno's voice. "You've got me by the fucking balls, don'tcha?"  
  
Rude only replied with a grim nod.  
  
"SHIT!" Items being dropped again, just after they were picked up. Reno stood up, sagging from his position. "I'll go."  
  
As the door shut behind Reno, Rude gently sighed to himself. "Good luck friend. you'll need it."  
  
Suddenly the door opened again and a head with flame-red hair poked in. "Wow, you used whole sentences Rude!" With that, Reno was gone and Rude did something he rarely did. He smiled.  
  
.oOo.  
  
Reeve leant backwards in his chair, stretching his arms above his head and pointing his toes, feeling the comfortable ache throughout his body. A yawn seized control as his arms slackened, his shoulder blades meeting. Sitting upright again, his gaze returned to that sheet again. Disturbing news indeed. why would anyone want to start an insurrection against Neo Shinra? Since I took control, we've changed for the better. We help people now. why would anyone want to get rid of us? We've done more in the last two years than Shinra had in over a century!  
  
Reeve just couldn't understand it but he wasn't too worried. He had Turks investigating it, as was their job. If needs be he would order it to be crushed, but he was loathe to do that. It would seem as if Neo Shinra were just like the Shinra of old and that was far from the truth. No, Reeve wanted a peaceful end to this situation, if indeed it became a situation. At the moment it was a small group of dissidents that could do no worse than write nasty pamphlets. But if it were to grow. Reeve sighed, trying to push it from his mind. It was so unlikely.  
  
.oOo.  
  
As Reno stepped from the subway train late at night, he saw movement in a dark corner. A sound reached his ears but it took him a few seconds to realise it was a muffled scream. As he ran towards the source, he saw three men. no, youths attacking a woman. One of them held her from behind, a hand clasped tightly across her mouth while a second had a hand up her skirt, the other squeezing a breast. The third one was down on one knee, busy tipping out the contents of her handbag onto the grimy floor. It was this one who Reno hit first, connecting his boot to the underside of the kids head with a vicious crack, spinning him from his crouched position to sprawling into a pillar, his jaw broken and blood everywhere. The sudden movement catching their attention, the other two dropped the woman, turning to face Reno. She sunk to the floor, still screaming.  
  
"You're gonna pay for fucking up our fun mister!" said the second, drawing a knife his jacket pocket. The other youth stepped forwards, doing likewise.  
  
Reno's eyes narrowed as he steeled himself. One of them came running at him, the knife glinting as it arced towards Reno who just stood there. Snapping an arm out, he caught hold of his opponent's wrist, spinning him around and sending him crashing into his partner. Picking themselves from the floor, they came at him slower this time, the first slashing at Reno's face. He swayed to the left, feeling the blade score across his cheek. He replied with his fist smashing into the kid's nose, sending him back a few paces. The second lunged at Reno's chest but he sidestepped, spinning neatly to bring his heel down on the back of his head, knocking him to the floor unconscious. The first one, upon seeing this, turned and started to run for the stairs upwards. Reno casually picked up the knife that lay beside him, hefted it in his hands and then threw it. The kid fell, the blade jutting from his shoulder where Reno had aimed.  
  
Dragging the unconscious body beside him to the pillar, he sat the kid leaning against it. Leaving those two where they lay, he walked over to the one who had tried to run, viciously pulling the blade from his back. As he screamed, Reno grabbed him by the collar, dragging him to the pillar as well. Positioning them equidistantly around it, he handcuffed them to each other before turning his attention to the woman. She was still screaming; quite how she'd been able to do it for that long was amazing but it dawned upon him the fight hadn't been all that long. Adrenaline had slowed it all down for him.  
  
He went down on one knee, gently touching her on the shoulder. Her eyes snapped open, an open palm swinging for his face. He let it go, feeling the pain flare as it caught him hard on the cheek. Shock covered her face when she realised she'd struck her saviour, not one of her attackers. She started to sob with relief, throwing her arms around him. He held her to him, whispering gently in her ear.  
  
Finally, she pushed away, looking him in the eyes, her own brimming with tears, a smile matching the one on his face. She pulled some of her brown hair from her face where it had stuck with sweat. "Thank you so much! I. I don't know what I'd have done if."  
  
"Don't worry 'bout it. No use thinking about what might've been. Come on, let's get you out of here." Gently, he helped her to her feet. She was a little wobbly so he draped one of her arms over his shoulders, helping her all the way. Once they were outside, the fresh night air struck them both, calming them. "You gonna be alright here? I'll go back and get your stuff."  
  
She nodded, so he turned away, making his way back down the stairs. He gathered up her belongings, putting them all back in her handbag. One of them caught his attention; a black and white picture with a vague shape on it - a foetal scan. Looking at the three handcuffed around the pillar, hatred flared up so deeply that Reno thought about killing them all, there and then. Instead he settled for giving the lone still conscious youth a meaty kick to the balls, his screams of agony echoing throughout the deserted station.  
  
Back outside, he handed the woman her handbag. His gaze wandered to her belly - he hadn't noticed before but it most definitely showed the swell of a child. "Male or female?"  
  
"Hunh?"  
  
"Your baby. Male or female? I didn't look that closely at the scan."  
  
"Oh, male. He's gonna be a big, str--" she cut herself off as a terrible thought struck her. "Oh no. what if. they harmed it?!" She grabbed hold of his arm, her grip like an iron vice.  
  
"Look, I've called the police. They'll be here right away. We can get an FME to check you out if you need."  
  
"F. ME?"  
  
"Sorry, to used to the technical jargon. Forensic Medical Examiner. They're basically doctors."  
  
"You're a policeman?"  
  
"Nope, I'm a Turk. My names Reno Lyngley."  
  
"I'm Naomi Sutherland. Uhm. how long are they gonna take? I'm really worried." she held a hand to her chest as if to protect her unborn child from the possible threat. She fell into his arms again, Reno holding her tightly, his thoughts drifting somewhere else as the sound of sirens started to fill the air.  
  
.oOo.  
  
He sat through all of the interviews with her, his status as a Turk standing him in good stead with the Police, added to that as the white knight of a young pregnant woman. He also waited outside a closed office as she was attended to by the FME who declared the baby and her to be absolutely fine. Afterwards, the FME has tended to the cut on his cheek, but Reno was without his customary wink to an attractive young woman. His thoughts were on someone else. Five hours later, they left the station and were offered a lift back in a police car.  
  
"Uhm, where do ya live Naomi?"  
  
"Kalm actually, but I'm staying with a friend here at 67 Yardling Street." The driver nodded, taking a turn to the left.  
  
"Heh, that's funny. I'm being posted to Kalm."  
  
"Well, maybe I'll see you around then."  
  
They sat in silence until they arrived at her place. As she got out of the car, Reno told the driver to wait. Getting out as well, he walked her to the door.  
  
As it opened up, a woman looking at the pair behind it, Reno took Naomi's hand, bending over to kiss it softly. Lights went on in his head. No wedding band!  
  
"Well, good night milady. 'Till we meet again." He walked back to the police car, a smile on his face as he heard the whispered conversation behind him.  
  
"Well, who's that hottie?"  
  
"Reno Lyngley. He's a Turk!" the pride evident in her voice, all thoughts of the earlier incident pushed from her mind.  
  
.oOo.  
  
Reno smiled all the way back to the block of flats where he lived. He smiled all the way up the stairs. He smiled all the way into his apartment. He smiled all the way into his bed. He smiled all the way to sleep. But there the smiles stopped and the nightmares started. 


	3. Call of the Wild

Heroes they call us. jeez, if only they knew the truth. A crackpot, a barmaid dressed like a prostitute, a kooky woman of a different species, the man with the crudest mouth down to humankind, the man with the rudest mouth. a little ninja thief girl, a monster and a stuffed toy. What a bunch of heroes we made. but I guess that doesn't matter really. I mean, we did it and all. We totalled Midgar but hey, we saved the world! Humanity is still alive! But weren't we meant to be fighting for the planet? Is humanity really a good thing to keep on a planet as fragile as this?  
  
Thinking was pretty much all that he had the time for these days. He sighed, taking the brush from where it leant against the wall. Back and forth. back and forth. the feathery head of the broom glided over the floor, piling all the crap that had gathered in the bar the previous night. This was what Cloud Strife, world famous hero, the saviour of humanity, had been relegated to - sweeping the floor of his fiancé's bar. It wasn't even as if there weren't enough bins around the place! They just couldn't be bothered to use them, dropping all of their rubbish on the floor. It was starting to drive Cloud crazy but cutting loose wouldn't do him any good.  
  
He paused, resting his arms atop the broom handle, looking up at where the Ultima sword was hung above the bar along with the Premium Heart. Two years had passed since he'd hung up his sword and he missed it. The thrill of pain, the satisfaction of rending flesh, the smell of fresh blood. As gruesome as it might sound, that was what Cloud missed. Then there was the camaraderie, the feeling of cold air slamming against his body and the wonders that he saw. And then there was Aeris. Gods, how he missed her. Those green eyes, carrying her soul for everyone to see. Her innocence and purity, shining forth in whatever it was she did, even when it was hitting people over the head with the Princess Guard. There wasn't a single imperfection in her character, no flaw in her unconditional love. and she had paid the ultimate price for it. But then again, would it really be all that bad to join with the Lifestream, to be with all of those that had already moved on in their lives? Maybe not.  
  
Hearing footsteps heading towards the door, Cloud quickly resumed sweeping, not wanting to be caught slacking, Tifa would give him hell. As the door, opened, a petite figure was silhouetted in the mid-morning sunlight. Hair pulled back into a loose ponytail ran down to her hips, the chestnut-brown colouring becoming clear as she continued walking in.  
  
"Working hard Cloud?"  
  
"Meh."  
  
"What kind of welcome back is that for your darling fiancé?"  
  
Her face popped underneath his, her brown eyes enveloping him in love. He couldn't help but smile, his grin reflected upon her face.  
  
"How the hell did a fruitcake like me end up with a woman like you?"  
  
"You're not a fruitcake Cloud and you know that," she scolded him softly. "Besides, I keep asking myself the same question."  
  
"I'm certainly not a woman, I know that much!"  
  
With a mock punch to his arm, Tifa struggled to hold the laughter in, her pearly white teeth showing as she failed miserably. Quickly she kissed him before slipping her arms around his waist and resting her head on his chest. "I love you Cloud."  
  
"I know."  
  
Two years and he still hasn't said it to me. all I want is to hear those three words. No, I'll wait as I always have. He does love me, he just needs to learn how to express himself, but she knew that wasn't exactly true.  
  
.oOo.  
  
11pm and Tifa was dead on her feet as usual. She didn't let it show but working in the bar always wore her down since she'd left the life on the road behind. It just wasn't as. exciting. Yes, that was it. It just didn't seem to hold her interest like it once did. Silently we walked between the tables, picking up empty glasses and putting them on the tray she was carrying with a practiced grace. Cloud was busy "helping" the last of the customers out of the door. In a dead-end town like Kalm, there wasn't a whole lot else to do but drink. Carrying her load through to the kitchen, she gently placed it down beside the sink where Misty was slaving as always. The lanky seventeen had a smile on her lightly freckled face as always, her strawberry blonde hair dangling over her eyes. Tifa knew exactly why the young girl was smiling and it left her with a wistful feeling in her heart. To be young and in love again. HAH! What am I thinking? I'm not old! But still. this isn't exactly where I saw myself all those years ago.  
  
"Last load Misty, then you can go home."  
  
"Ok Mrs Strife."  
  
A smile. "We're not married yet and I've told you more than enough times to call me Tifa. Maybe I should start docking your pay each time you call me that?"  
  
The frantic scrubbing stopped. "Uhh. sorry Tifa." Quick flash of a tongue poking out before resuming the washing-up.  
  
Such a shame, not that I can blame her. I feel exactly the same way about him too and he doesn't love either of us. Tifa stood stock-still, not knowing where on earth that last part had come from. Shaking her head, she moved back into the main bar where Cloud came in, a huge grin plastered across his face.  
  
"Guess who's come to visit Aunty Tifa today?"  
  
From behind came a high-pitched squeal of excitement as a little head poked out from behind Cloud's back.  
  
"Marlene!" Placing both hands on the bar, she vaulted it easily, her previous exhaustion forgotten in the surprise. As the little girl ran forwards, Tifa scooped Marlene up in her arms, spinning her around the room.  
  
Besides Cloud, a second figure looked in the doorway, almost as if the night had just given birth to him. The two of them watched Tifa and Marlene as they careened around the room crazily.  
  
"Dat's one helluva sight, no doubt 'bout it!"  
  
Finally Tifa set the little girl down on the bar, puffing a little. "My, you've gotten so big Marlene! You're not as easy to spin round like that anymore!"  
  
Winking slyly to Cloud, Barret carefully sneaked up behind Tifa. well, as quietly as a man the size of Barret can. Marlene tried desperately not to laugh at the strange faces her "daddy" was pulling in an effort to be stealthy.  
  
"So, if you're here Marlene," Tifa continued, "then that big lummox of a dad you've got can't be far away can he?" As she turned around, Barret scooped her up as she had done to Marlene a few moments ago and started to spin her around.  
  
"Aaaaaaaaaaah! Put me down you oaf!" she wailed, battering ineffectively at Barret's back, but her heart wasn't in it.  
  
Finally finished in the kitchen, but startled by all the noises coming from the bar, Misty stuck her head through the adjoining door and her jaw hit the ground when she saw what was going on, and even more so when she saw Cloud just standing there, laughing as hard as he could.  
  
"Uhh, Mrs Str-Tifa?"  
  
Quickly Barret put her down, looking bashful at being caught acting so childishly.  
  
"You know I hate it when you do that." Giving Barret a quick punch on the arm, Tifa turned her attention to the young lady. "Uhh. you all done then Misty? Well, Guess I'd better get you your pay then. Tifa moved behind the bar to the cash register, springing it open and deftly counting out Misty's wages.  
  
"Yeah, about that. Would it be possible for me to get an advance on next week as well? I, uhh. got something I need the money for," Misty asked, her face blushing as she took in the large man hovering a few meters away.  
  
"Come over here Misty. He's not gonna bite your head off or anything." As she traipsed over to where Tifa stood at the till, taking the money from the proffered hand, the proprietor of the Eighth Wonder continued. "Misty Dulwich, I'd like you to meet a good friend of mine, Barret Wallace."  
  
Misty dropped the money in shock at meeting another of the famous heroes of Avalanche. Stooping to quickly gather it all up, her face turned an even deeper shade of red.  
  
"I. ahh. uhm." As Barret reached out his new right hand, Misty could only stare at it.  
  
"Uhh, don't worry about it Barret. She was like that for the first few days she worked here as well. Cloud, do you want to walk Misty home?"  
  
Snapping back to reality, Misty's face looked like it was about to explode from overheating by the shade it had now developed. "Uhm really, I'll be alright." Grabbing her coat from a hook on the wall, Misty half-walked, half-ran from the bar.  
  
"Go after her Cloud, make sure she gets back safe and sound alright?" With a nod, Cloud left quietly through the door, shutting it behind him.  
  
"So, Barret, take a seat. You want a drink?"  
  
"Actually, I think it's way b'yond somebody's bedtime, don't ya Marlene?"  
  
With a squeal of mock horror, the little girl launched herself from the bar and ran into the kitchen.  
  
"Dis could take a while Tif', ya wanna get one poured ready for me? Same as always." With a sigh, Barret loped after Marlene, bellowing something or other about beds.  
  
.oOo.  
  
He caught up with her about halfway down the street. When she saw him coming, she had started to speed up but refusing to show herself up further by running. It hadn't been too difficult for him to catch up.  
  
"You alright Misty?" Cloud said, gently taking her arm.  
  
Turning to face him, tears were running down her face. "I made a total fool of myself in there. didn't I?"  
  
"I couldn't really say. It's kinda odd for us as well y'know? We're just ordinary yeah right people like you. We don't deal all too well with hero- worship just like you don't with worshipping heroes. or something like that." A pause. "Uhh. it made sense to me a moment or two ago."  
  
Misty laughed, cutting herself off quickly.  
  
"Come on, let's get you back home shall we."  
  
"Ok Cloud," she said, her face brightening. She quickly linked her arm through his as they walked. He was all too conscious of her pressing her breasts against his trapped limb and wondered what exactly he was supposed to do about it. Shake her off and upset her or leave it be and end up encouraging her? Both were deadly pitfalls, waiting to snatch up the unsuspecting male. What shocked him more was the fact he felt slightly aroused by it. Looking at Misty out of the corner of his eye, he could see he had a blissful smile on her face, as if she was miles away at the moment. Gods. that dress she's wearing is so similar to Aeris'. Pink and white checks only served to accent the swells and curves of the young girls body, the row of buttons running up the middle containing the slight strain against them. She carried her coat in her free arm, her lips moving as if she were talking to someone. Suddenly he realised that she was indeed talking to him, that he had been so enraptured by looking at her that he hadn't noticed. Cloud blushed, hoping the veil of the night covered it.  
  
"Uhm, what was that Misty, I didn't quite hear it?"  
  
"Oh, well, I was saying that Mr Wallace looked really scary, but the stories that Tifa had been telling me about him always made him seem so cute and huggable."  
  
Cloud snorted a quick laugh, making Misty look at him with indignation flashing in her eyes. "Sorry, it's just that the words 'cute', 'huggable' and 'Barret' just don't belong together in the same sentence. I've only met one person who could be even more intimidating." As she started laughing, his thoughts drifted off. Brother of the sword and of the soul. Sephiroth.  
  
Looking up, he realised they were standing outside of her house. "Ah well, it looks like we're here Misty. Uhm, I'll see you on Monday for work?"  
  
"Yeah, sure Cloud." Always calls Tifa 'Mrs Strife' but I get first-name treatment?  
  
She gave him a quick peck on the cheek, Cloud trying his best not to shy away. Pulling back, she looked into his eyes as if trying to make up her mind about something. With a slight shake of her head, she ran for the gate, calling "Bye!" over the shoulder and waving with her free hand.  
  
Cloud's heart sunk and he hated himself for it. What the hell is going on with me? This can't be right. I lo. I'm with Tifa. Nothing will change that.  
  
Cloud walked back to the bar, hands in pockets as he kicked dejectedly at the cobblestones, his conscience preying on his thoughts.  
  
.oOo.  
  
"So Barret, what brings you all the way out here to Kalm?" she asked, carefully pouring Barret, and then herself a second and last shot of sangria each. Two shots, that's all for me. I'll be off with the faeries when Cloud gets back and out like a light before the hour's up. Like most devout martial artists, Tifa tended to keep her body pure but at times she liked the odd tipple or two to 'keep her spirits high'. Of course, this meant she also had no resistance to alcohol, it going straight to her head.  
  
"Well, mostly ta give Elmyra a rest. Lookin' after Marlene day afta day can get pretty "  
  
"Elmyra?"  
  
"Oh. heh, yeah. She's been stayin' wit' us , helpin' look afta Marlene. I figure it's good for da lady. Wit' Aeris gone, she's been alone n' all and well. it helps me out a helluva lot to have someone who knows Marlene look afta her."  
  
"So there's nothing going on I should know about then Barret?" Tifa asked with a sly wink.  
  
"WHAT?!" Barret flew off into one of his assumed spluttering rages, Tifa merely shaking her head and smiling to herself. He could do a lot worse. someone who cares for Marlene and she's only what. six, seven years older than him?  
  
"Y'know, it really wouldn't be the worst of ideas Barret."  
  
"Bah, I oughta stop actin' like such a kid. I guess I been thinkin' da same kinda stuff as you, but I dunno if I can do that to Marlene n' all." Reaching for the bottle, Barret poured Tifa another shot and then himself.  
  
"No, I really shouldn't. you know I can't handle my drink Barret."  
  
"Aww go on, just cut loose fer the hell of it Tif'!"  
  
"What the hell." She quickly downed the contents, shaking her head and sticking her tongue out as the sourness stung the back of her throat.  
  
.oOo.  
  
Pushing open the door, he was greeted by the raucous cries of two drunks, both having gone way past the two shots that Tifa limited herself to.  
  
"Come and join ush Cloud. We've been dishcusshing the fut-chure and shtuff like that," slurred Tifa, struggling to keep her head up straight, the half- empty shot glass in her hand drooping. In a sudden burst of concentration, she looked up and focused on it, lifting it to her mouth and quickly swallowing the contents in one. Grabbing the bottle, she tried to pour another one but only succeeded in soaking the table in even more sangria. It looked like she'd been having this problem for quite a few minutes.  
  
Striding forwards, Cloud seized Tifa's hand that held the bottle, forcing her to put it down.  
  
"Aww, wasshat fer Cloud? You not happy to shee yer old friend Barret 'gain?" cried the hefty black man.  
  
"Not in the state you're in Barret. Think about Marlene! She's probably been kept awake by the two of you idiots down here!"  
  
"Aww shit man. you shure now how ta crassh a party, din'tcha? I guessh I oughta go check on her."  
  
As Barret staggered away, Cloud turned his attention back to Tifa. This was worrying him; it was the second time this week she'd got drunk, the ninth this month. Ever so gradually she had been increasing her drinking and Cloud just didn't know what to do about it. He couldn't take her away from the bar; it was all she had ever worked and hoped for. She'd got out of Midgar and made it. he couldn't just take that away from her but the temptation just seemed to be too strong for her. Unless there was another cause.  
  
"C'mon Tifa, let's get you up and to bed alright?" She stretched out her arms, draping them loosely around his neck as he lifted her to her feet. Looking up, she gagged, throwing a hand over her mouth before turning away and heaving her guts up on the hardwood floor. Quickly Cloud moved over to her, pulling her loose hair away from her face. "Come on, get it all out of your system."  
  
Between gasps for air she managed to break free of his grasp and ran for the kitchen in an effort to save her bar the ignominy of being absolutely covered in her vomit. Cloud quickly followed her, resuming hair-holding duties with one hand whilst gently caressing her back with his other one. When it seemed she had finally finished, a full three minutes later, he gently helped her upstairs while she muttered and giggled to herself. Taking one sniff, he decided he was going to have to clean her up properly and give her clothes a good scrub in the morning.  
  
"Come on Tifa, we've got to get you out of these clothes if we're gonna get you clean." Gently he eased the braces from her shoulders and started to lift her top off for her. Finally catching on that he was taking her clothes off she came up with a choice line that made Cloud want to be physically sick as well.  
  
"You wanna have shex? Yessh, let'sh have shex and make shome babiesh. hee hee hee."  
  
"No Tifa!" he barked at her, his anger carrying through in the sheer ferocity of his voice. She shrank away from him, swinging her arms at him. Trying to rectify it, Cloud moved in to hug it, but Tifa managed to gather some of her senses back and lashed out, catching him on the chin, sending him staggering backwards into the small medicine cabinet behind him.  
  
She. hit me. the bitch!  
  
Cloud stepped forward, slapping her hard across the face. Tifa fell to the floor of the bathtub, clutching her face and bursting into tears. The door slammed open and Barret, still as drunk as hell staggered in. Seeing Tifa crying in the bathtub half naked, he grabbed Cloud by the throat lifting the younger man from his feet. Lashing out, Cloud caught Barret square in the stomach with his right foot, making Barret drop him heavily to the floor as the big man stumbled backwards, falling over and whacking his head on the floor.  
  
"DADDY!" Marlene came running from the room that Barret had set her up in for the night, diving to her knees beside him, clutching at his arm, crying. Streams of tears ran from her eyes as she wailed piercingly into the night.  
  
Cloud picked himself up from the floor, walking over to Barret. Crouching over him, he lifted his closed eyelids, but it was clear the big man was out cold, the fall combined with the alcohol in his system sticking him into shutdown for the night. Grabbing him by the opposite arm from Marlene, he struggled to get him into a manoeuvrable position and eventually settled for dragging him across the floor.  
  
"C'mon Marlene, help Uncle Cloud get Daddy into bed alright?" but to no avail. She sullenly clung onto Barret, her piteous howling now quietened. After about ten minutes, he finally got the former leader of Avalanche into the foldaway bed but he couldn't get Marlene to sleep in hers, instead letting her sleep curled up next to Barret.  
  
He trudged back into the bathroom where Tifa was still in the bathtub crying to herself. He sat down on the rim, gently stroking her hair. "Hush Tifa. hush."  
  
Looking up, she threw her arms around him, her breasts squashed against his chest. "I'm sssho shorry. I ssshouldn't have hit you!"  
  
"Don't worry 'bout it now Tifa. I shouldn't have hit you either. Let's just get you clean, alright? That's what we'll do now."  
  
Helping her to her feet, he stood her up in the bathtub, slowly removing the rest of her clothes; taking her miniskirt and panties off while she leant on him for support. Getting in with her but leaving his clothes on, he grabbed the showerhead and turned it on, aiming it away from her at first to let it warm up first. Sticking it back into position, he slowly turned Tifa around in his arms, letting the water cover her completely. He ran his fingers through her hair, making sure it all got a good soaking and all the vomit caught on strands had been cleaned off. This is my duty. I have to stand by her but I don't know if I'm strong enough. Taking a sponge, he wet it thoroughly, running it thoroughly over her body, making sure he left no patch untouched. Finally satisfied she was clean enough he turned the shower off. Stepping out first, he then helped her, grabbing a towel as he did so. She slumped against a wall, totally exhausted. He quickly towelled off most of the excess water before taking a warm fluffy sleeping gown from where it hung on the back of the bathroom door. Easing her into it, he led her into the bedroom to sit on the edge of the king- size they had. Quickly grabbing a second towel, he sat behind her, his legs either side of hers. He tried to dry her hair as best he could without being too rough. Finally, he helped her out of the dressing gown again and slipped her into the bed, tucking all of the sheets in tightly around her, making sure to cover her with the duvet.  
  
He left the room, quickly checking in on Marlene and Barret before heading downstairs. For the next hour he cleaned the mess the two former journey companions had created, wiping away the vomit and liquor stains, replacing the bottle back on the shelf behind the bar and righting the tables and chairs they'd knocked over. He took one of the chairs upstairs with him, setting it facing towards the bed and window. Sitting down, he held his hands in his hands, crying tears that no-one was there to see. He looked at Tifa lying there, her innocence restored from the wild-eyed thing that had attacked him in the bathroom. The moon shone through the window, casting its pale blue light through the slats creating a complex pattern of shadows. Tifa lay in the light while Cloud sat in the dark.  
  
Finally sighing, Cloud took the chair downstairs again, checking on Barret and Marlene one last time. They looked so peaceful and happy, lying there curled up together.  
  
Going back into his and Tifa's room, he stripped off his clothes and slid between the sheets, lying on his back and staring up at the ceiling. It seemed an age before Tifa's arm draped over him, her head nuzzling its way onto his chest. He gently stroked her hair as she mumbled in her sleep.  
  
"Don't leave me Cloud, don't ever leave me. I don't know what I'd do without you."  
  
So this is to be my fate is it? Trapped in this Purgatory? We're all looking for our own ways out. who'll be the first to go far enough to succeed?  
  
.oOo.  
  
Barret woke up with a hand clamped tightly over his mouth. He looked up to see Cloud holding a finger over his mouth to indicate silence before pointing to the huddled shape beside him. Seeing his nod, Cloud removed his hand and Barret, still clothed and smelling of alcohol from the previous night, slid out of the bed and followed him downstairs. Sitting in the chair Cloud pulled up for him, Barret rubbed his chest, a tender patch there he wasn't too sure of how it had been irritated in the first place. He remembered the place being absolutely trashed by him and Tifa but now it was absolutely spotless. Had Cloud been working all night to clean up after them? Man, he was gonna be so pissed off at him.  
  
"Uhh, I guess I oughta apologise man. Sorry fer trashin' the join last night."  
  
"You don't remember what happened?"  
  
"Not really man, me n' Tifa were pretty outta it." Barret yawned a giant yawn for a giant of a man, his arms flailing about behind his head. "I swear, I can't have got too much sleep last night."  
  
"No, not sleep really. You were out cold."  
  
"Yeh right man. I din't have that much to drink."  
  
"No, I knocked you out last night. You really don't remember do you?"  
  
Barret looked Cloud in the eyes and he knew there was something Cloud was skirting around. "Spit it out man. Youse hidin' somethin'. Why the hell wudya knock me out?"  
  
Cloud sighed, not sure if the next words to come out of his mouth would end up leading to another fight. "Because I hit Tifa last night."  
  
"WHAT?!" Barret's hands smashed down on the table as he stood up, his jaw clenched tightly, his temples throbbing slightly.  
  
"Sit your goddamned chunky ass down before I knock you out again," Cloud hissed, standing upright as well. "Tifa's still asleep upstairs so for God's sake, don't wake her!"  
  
"What da fuck happened last night! You best have a good reason fer hittin' Tifa or I'm gonna rip yer fuckin' head off!"  
  
Cloud sunk back into his chair, taking upon a defeated look. "I. I don't know. It's just. I came back last night and she was pissed out of her head again. She's been doing it more and more often. then, when I was trying to clean her up some, she punched me. I. just flipped. I slapped her. hard. I swear, anything you do to me Barret can't hurt as much as my heart did when I connected. Anyway, you burst in and tried to throttle me to death. I had no choice, you were totally outta it man. I kicked you right in the chest, sending you backwards. You fell over and hit your head, going out like a light. Marlene started crying like mad and. and. GODDAMMIT!"  
  
"Yo, chill Cloud. Chill. Shit. so what? Tif's got a drinkin' problem? That it?"  
  
Cloud could only nod, the tears pouring down. If this had been Aeris he'd been talking to, she'd have hugged him, told him it would all work out fine. but if Aeris had been there, none of this would have happened in the first place.  
  
"I. I guess I've known for a while. I don't know what the hell to do about it though. This is her pride and joy Barret! We put well over half the money that we had into buying this place and then fixing it up. She's worked so hard for all of this, ever since leaving Nibelheim. I can't take it away but. we can't stay here. I've sat here and watched her slowly tear herself to pieces and there's not a damned thing I can do about it!"  
  
"Look man, dis is somethin' I ain't never told no-one 'bout, not even Tif'. Back when I got thrown outta Corel, I started to drink. Heavily man. and I had Marlene in tow wit' me the whole time. If I hadn't sorted myself out, she wouldn't still be wit' me today."  
  
"Barret. I."  
  
"Shut it Cloud. I don't need yer stinkin' sympathy. What's done is done. the thing is, we gotta be strong fer Tifa. Since ya came back in her life, YOU'VE been her life. Wit'out ya, she's fucked. Not even I'll be able ta help her outta the hole she'll dig 'erself inta. We've gotta help her. You've gotta help her. she needs ya just like you needed her when you was in that Lifestream."  
  
"But I can't cope much longer Barret. you've gotta stay and help me!"  
  
"I will, but I can only be gone from Corel fer so long man. Come the end of the week, me and Marlene are gone. After that, you're gonna have to settle this yerself."  
  
No matter how much Cloud cried, he just couldn't make Barret agree to stay any longer.  
  
.oOo.  
  
The sun shone so bright, she barely open her eyes for the pain it gave her. Light. burning. she grabbed a pillow and stuck it over her head, trying to stop the ringing in her ears. Slowly the previous night drifted back to her and she started to weep. Tears for what she had done and how she had hurt those she loved the most. Marlene, Barret, Cloud. Cloud. He. hit me? Voices drifted up to her from downstairs.  
  
"But I can't cope much longer Barret. you've gotta stay and help me!"  
  
"I will, but I can only be gone from Corel fer so long man. Come the end of the week, me and Marlene are gone. After that, you're gonna have to settle this yerself."  
  
She vaguely remembered hearing other words from downstairs earlier but her brain was so scrambled, she just couldn't wring any sense from it.  
  
"I'm gonna go and check on Marlene now. Sounds like we all gave her one helluva scare last night."  
  
"Alright. I'll go talk to Tifa."  
  
Quickly, she pretended to be asleep, not wanting to face the recriminations from last night or. worse.  
  
"Tifa, you awake?" Gently, he lifted the pillow from her head.  
  
Grabbing hold of the pillow, she pulled it back to covering her head. "Please. just leave me alone Cloud. I. I can't forgive you for last night. Just go."  
  
"And you think I can forgive you either? Not just for last night, all the other nights. I'm worried about you Tifa."  
  
She flipped herself over and sat upright in the bed, not caring about her nudity. "Is that why you hit me Cloud? You cared so much you had to beat whatever was so wrong out of me?!"  
  
"That's not fair." Cloud looked away, not able to take the venomous stare she was giving him. "You. you've got a drinking problem and I just wa--"  
  
He was cut off by her screams. "GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE! GET OUT NOW YOU BASTARD!" She pushed him from the bed, standing over him completely naked. It was then she heard the startled cry from the doorway. Barret was standing there, his hands gripping tightly onto Marlene's shoulders. Quickly, he picked her up and started to make his way downstairs.  
  
"No. Marlene." Tifa started to cry, her shoulders drooping as she seemed to sink into herself. Cloud gingerly picked himself up off the floor, wrapping her tightly in his embrace. She beat at his chest as the tears continued to come forth. "L. let go of me you bastard! Let. go! Let.. go." Slowly she dissolved into complete hysterics, weeping uncontrollably into his chest, her hands resting gently upon him. They stood there for what seemed like hours, until the sun had almost completed its golden arc through the sky. They stood there until the chaos all around them started to finally settle itself down. They stood there until the tears ran dry. 


	4. Plumbing the Depths

His fingers tapped irritably on the steering wheel he gripped, their beat matching that of the random speed metal his radio was blasting out. He kept his eyes focused behind the dark sunglasses that covered them; the road in front of him stretching on for what seemed like infinity to him, inexplicably leading him to the quiet little seaside village of Kalm. Of all the goddamned places on this planet, Rude had to send me here. he's smarter than I gave him credit for. Where else could Reno of the Turks cause less havoc? Where else would Reno of the Turks be forced to give up drinking? There was only one bar in Kalm, and that was run by someone he had no intentions of ever bumping into again. Sure, it'd take some serious work on his behalf, but meeting her again. that was one hell of a bad idea. She'd kill him, and to be honest, he wouldn't blame her for it. In her place, he'd do exactly the same. Here was the very same bastard who'd killed thousands of people in one swift blow.  
  
Reno shook his head; thinking like that was only gonna drag him further down the spiral. It was a vicious cycle; thinking about things like that made him upset, and being upset made him think of things like that. It was something he'd never escape; the innocent souls of thousands lay upon his hands and he could never wash them clean, they were eternally stained with blood. But they'd all been done for a reason. it was his duty. It was his job. He had to do it; it was what he was paid for, the dirty jobs Shinra didn't dare do publicly. But that was over and he was glad of it. He couldn't have picked anyone better to take over Shinra; Reeve may well be a bit of a pussy when it comes to battle, but h was a good person at heart, and whatever his ideals told him, he'd do the right thing. that was what's important, doing the right thing. If Reno had known how to do that, he'd never have squeezed the detonator.  
  
Blinking furiously, Reno swerved around the eighteen-wheeler in front of him, his thoughts had dragged him away from his all too simple purpose; drive to Kalm and settle in for a long stay. Leviathan knew when he was going to get out of the hellhole he was about three miles away from; for all he knew, Rude intended to keep him there for the rest of his life. But then again, it could have been worse. it could have been Mideel.  
  
Finally it appeared on the horizon; the small village that held within the key to a dark past he no longer wanted to relive. No good could come of this.  
  
.oOo.  
  
"My name is."  
  
She paused, her heart fluttering. As she looked at the sea of faces around her, only one thought kept on running through her head: What the hell am I doing here? They all sat in their uncomfortable wooden chairs, looking up at her, the looks on their faces all asking the same question: What's she doing here? They just couldn't believe that 'She' was before them, that 'She' was a lost soul just like one of them.  
  
"My name is Tifa Lockheart and I'm an alcoholic."  
  
"Hello Tifa," came the obligatory chorus of voices. They didn't reply because they wanted to; it was required. They had to make the newbie feel welcome about sharing their thoughts. When it came down to it, who they were before didn't matter; they were a drunk. They were one of them now, another soul fighting against the addiction that ruled their lives. They were alcoholics; they lived their lives by the liquid demon. Every second without it was a struggle, whether they admitted it to themselves or not. They needed it, craved it, and loved it, all the same time as they hated it.  
  
.and so they ended up here, an AA meeting. Alcoholics Anonymous. 'My name is . and I'm an alcoholic," was their calling card, the mark of every single meeting that had ever been. The new introduced themselves, shared their problems while the others nodded knowingly; they'd all been there so many years ago. Most of these meetings were headed by long-term members themselves; they'd seen and done it all themselves, they knew what would happen and could prepare for it.  
  
"My problem started after the death of Sephiroth. My home for so many years had been destroyed and I had no place to go to anymore. Cloud was my only reason for living anymore. we settled here, in Kalm, starting up the only business I knew how to run; the Eighth Wonder bar. As long as Cloud and me were together, that was all that would matter.  
  
"How silly that was. he didn't love me. The whole time, he didn't even know who he was. He loved Aeris, not me. He didn't know it and neither did I, but as time went by, he never said those words to me. I guess they meant more to me than I ever thought they could. He never told me that he loved me; that told me all I needed to know. Still, I refused to admit it to myself. For some reason, alcohol helped me, so I occasionally sought refuge in it. More time passed and still the words weren't coming. every day. every hour. every second without him saying it was like a torture to me. The only place I could hide from it was the bottom of a glass, but a glass can always be refilled, so there's a new bottom to seek.  
  
"He loved Aeris, not me. I honestly don't know why he's still with me, but every moment he is, I'll treasure it. That's all I can hope for really. Maybe one day, in the future, I'll love someone who loves me back. I know it won't be Cloud, but I don't really care. I'm alive now, and that's what I must live for. While he's by my side now, I will be happy. While I have him with me, I will be alright. While he's still in my life, I won't drink. I don't need alcohol; it's only an excuse to forget all that holds me to this world. I will fight it and I will win; I fought for the planet against Sephiroth and won, I will defeat this enemy as well. I have no choice; either I do, or I die. That's always been the price of failure and I'm still living now. I will not lose now!"  
  
Slowly, applause rang out around her. For a moment she was touched. the cared. They clapped for her strength. but then she realised that this was the same applause they gave everyone at AA meetings. They didn't clap because they wanted to; they applauded her because they had to. They were obligated.  
  
Tifa sank down into her chair and as another lost soul told the story of their spiral into alcoholicism, she thought about what she had done with her life. Her hometown had been destroyed by Sephiroth and she'd spent the rest of her life seeking revenge for that. She may have claimed she was protecting the planet, but it had always been about Sephiroth. She had indeed saved the world; people all over the planet knew her name. That didn't make the pain go away though; none of them actually knew her. They knew a generalisation, a gross one at that, of her personality, but that wasn't really her. In reality, she had done nothing with her life. She hadn't made a good life for herself; she wasn't in a loving relationship, she had no family, she didn't have an incredibly successful job. The superstar version of herself was a myth; it didn't really exist. That life was a lie, but so was her real life. She was in a loveless relationship, a dead-end job and no prospects to ever making it better. It was fake. it was all fake.  
  
She found herself clapping along with the others. Apparently another sob story had ended and another was about to begin. So what? This was reality; you had to deal with it. There was no other option.  
  
.oOo.  
  
The red convertible flew around a corner, its wheels spinning wildly as it sought to gain a purchase upon the dusty road. The driver, spotting his target, pushed the accelerator pedal to the floor. As he grew over closer to the white building, he suddenly grabbed the handbrake and yanking hard on it while squeezing the clutch, performing a one hundred and thirty degree tailspin, bringing the car to a halt, half on and half off the set of steps leading inside. A door opened and two men in navy blue suits came out, both wearing shirts and ties as well.  
  
"You can't park that car there sir. Now get it the hell outta here!" said the first one, his arms folded across his chest. As the cars owner got out of the car, the second man stiffened, but the first one never noticed this. As the driver walked straight up to him, he reached for the nightstick at his belt, but a fist clamped around his wrist.  
  
"I wouldn't suggest doing that boy. You'll end up with that fucking thing up your arse quicker than you can say Jack Daniels."  
  
"Who the hell do you think you are?" the Turk whispered sibilantly to the redhead before him, wearing a particularly loud Costan shirt.  
  
Finally the second Turk spoke. "He would think he's Reno of the Turks, our new Commander, and I'd think that you're in for a whole world of shit right now Jan."  
  
The colour drained straight from the first Turks face in realisation of what he had been about to do; attacking a senior officer wasn't actually a punishable offence in the Turks, but that was due to the fact that the senior officers always won the fights, and usually quite brutally. The Turks didn't do office politics; they held office death matches.  
  
Releasing the younger Turk's wrist, Reno appraised the two men before him. They certainly looked the part as Turks, but a lot of people could look good in the uniform; it was their cool under pressure that made them a force to be reckoned with.  
  
"What can we do for you sir?" asked the second Turk.  
  
"First, you can tell me your name, and secondly, you can tell me how you knew I was your new commander. I know Rude didn't pass word down about that yet; I've got the official documentation in the car."  
  
"My name's Raphael, and I know about your posting here via personal sources. I believe you know my sister."  
  
".Naomi? You're Naomi Sutherlands brother?"  
  
"Because of your deeds in Junon, I still have the pleasure of having a sister. For that you have my and my family's eternal gratitude. It will be an honour to serve under you."  
  
"Stick your nose any further up his arse and it'll be stained for life," sniggered the one called Jan. His brown hair was pulled back into a ponytail, showing the ugly purple scar that trailed itself across his forehead, inflicted two years earlier in the devastation of Midgar by Diamond Weapon.  
  
Reno cracked a grin before shaking his head. "Just doing my job Raphael. Now, is one of you two fucktards gonna show me around the place or what?"  
  
Jan started laughing while a scowl took place upon Raphael's face. "I think we're gonna get along just fine Reno," said the pony-tailed Turk, as he turned to go inside.  
  
Reno followed him, turning around to admire his parking one last time, thinking to himself. Maybe this place won't be so bad after all.  
  
.oOo.  
  
"Remember, take it one day at a time and we can all beat it together. Same time next week folks."  
  
With that, the meeting was officially closed. The sound of chairs scraping across the wooden floor flooded the room as they all rose en masse, making their way listlessly to the exit. Tifa found herself caught in the throng and let it guide her out in the rapidly darkening world outside. Dusk had started nearly ten minutes ago and the sky was a heavy grey; thick clouds blocking out the starlight that she loved. She felt like she was drowning; the only way out was to drink it all away, but she couldn't give in that easily.  
  
Silently she trudged through the gloomy streets until she came across the place that she called home. It lent itself to the rest of its surroundings; wood log outer layering giving it the appearance of being an old-fashioned log cabin. A simple sign was above the door; no neon lights, just an old- fashioned oil lamp that swayed to and fro each time the wind caught it, casting light upon the lettering that marked this place as the Eight Wonder - her home. She, Tifa Lockheart, saviour of the world, alcoholic and all- round good time gal worked in a bar. Oh, the irony of it all. her very livelihood depended on alcohol, yet it was also the curse she carried around with her. But what did that matter to her? She was out of that; she'd given up the drink. hadn't she? Its allure was still as verdant as ever, but she couldn't fail Cloud Marlene or the rest of her friends. No, she had to be strong. it was her duty. This was her purgatory; to stay strong for all the other people she cared for.  
  
Tifa walked to the door and laid her palm against it, ready to push it open inwards, but she paused. No, she didn't want to make a grand entrance now, did she? She walked around the back and took the delivery entrance instead; the only witness to her entrance being Misty. She could have gone to the bar and helped out Yvonne and Cloud in serving the customers, but she didn't feel quite feel up to it. Instead, she headed up the stairs to the bathroom, setting the hot water tap running before going into the bedroom. Pulling off the blue tanktop, her fingers hesitated over the buttons of the white shirt underneath. She shook her head before continuing on with the small task of undressing herself. Naked, she headed back to the bathroom where steam was rising from the bathtub. She turned the hot tap half of the way back while turning the cold all the way to full power. She sat upon the toilet as the bathtub grew ever closer to being full enough.  
  
As the water reached a level she deemed satisfactory, she turned both taps off, before slowly lowering herself in, the customary ripples lapping at her naked body. The water relieved her of her duties, her promises and her hassles; in this bath she was merely Tifa Lockheart, a young woman, born and bred in Nibelhiem. She hadn't saved the world, she wasn't in love with Cloud; she had nothing to tie her to reality. She was floating on the past. that was something that could always pacify her, Memories of Nibelhiem; her childhood, growing up to defy all that her father had said. Her mother had died years ago, disease taking her away. No, she had been brought up by her father; taught to do all of the things that he felt a girl of her age should know. She knew how to cook, how to be polite and how to play the piano, but none of these things really helped her in life. The only thing she'd learnt that helped her was the art of Sungei na Zangen; the martial art taught to her by her old master, Zangan. She had never known more of his name than that; he was always Master or Master Zangan. Yet still. when he died, it hurt her so much. She guessed it was because he was the first person to teach her something she had actually wanted to learn herself, not something that was expected of her. No, this was something that truly belonged to her.  
  
Slowly, she let herself sink underneath the water, holding her breath as long as she could. The water and the past encased her as one; the three of them combining to form a single whole.  
  
"Isn't the water cold by now Teef'?"  
  
She awoke with a start, a voice summoning her from her requiem. She wrapped one arm around her breasts, the other covering her vagina in shock, before she came to realise it was Cloud who sat upon the rim of the bathtub. She shivered as the cold of the water suffused her; her nipples quickly becoming hard. She reached her arms out, Cloud quickly taking them and helping her out of the bath.  
  
"I closed and cleaned the place up already, so need to worry about any of that now, Teef'," he said as he wrapped a towel around her. The cottony fabric warmed her skin; it felt like she was surrounded by feathers as he guided her towards the bedroom. For some reason, her mind was confused; nothing seemed right to her whatsoever. She found herself slowly falling backwards, onto the bed. She felt him enter her, but none of it seemed real. She felt his body tense above her, yet it seemed so false. She was somewhere else, just as she knew he was. No; this was all a lie; a lie made to convince themselves that what they had was real. The walls of her heart caved in, reality plummeting through the depths, only to be smashed upon the rocks at the bottom of the waterfall.  
  
.oOo.  
  
"So, you know anywhere good to drink around here?" came the inevitable question.  
  
"Well, there's two places, but I don't think you'll be going to one of them for sure."  
  
"Let me guess; the Eighth Wonder and right here in my new office. And I'll bet the place you're referring to is the Eighth Wonder."  
  
"Got it in one Reno," said Jan, leaning back in the chair, making it issue an agonising screech. "I doubt a certain Miss Tifa Lockheart will be wanting to see you any time soon. Not after Sector Seven."  
  
"What happened in Sector Seven?" came a voice. Raphael watched both of their faces, but neither Jan or Reno were giving away anything.  
  
After a long pause, Reno finally spoke: "I killed over a thousand people in one night, that's what happened."  
  
"Th. that was you? It was a Turks operation?"  
  
"Yeah, back in the days of President Shinra. AVALANCHE had been giving us a few problems so we were ordered to take out the plate. Back then, we always did what we were told, no questions asked. We weren't paid to have consciences."  
  
"How do you live with yourself after that?"  
  
"You don't. You become someone new. someone less than your old self." Reno swivelled in his seat to see Jan nodding in consent; he knew what it was like to have to do things any normal person would refuse to. "So, if we're gonna be drinking here, then where the fuck's the booze?"  
  
Jan reached inside of his jacket, pulling out a large, four-litre bottle of Strechnaya Vodka. "The real shit, brewed by the archaeologists up in Fossil Canyon. When you turned up earlier and Raphael so kindly introduced us all, I thought it might be a good idea to nab this out of my locker."  
  
"A man after my own heart, I see. Alright, lets get started!"  
  
"But we don't have any glasses chipped in Raphael, but he was met by shakes of the head from both Reno and Jan.  
  
"Who needs glasses?" said the latter, his ponytail bobbing about as he spoke. "Take it like a real man, straight from the bottle."  
  
Unscrewing the cap with one firm twist, Jan took a big swig from the bottle, before handing it over to Reno who did likewise. Raphael found the bottle proffered to him; holding his breath, he took a pull into his mouth and swallowed, the alcohol burning his throat and warming his chest. It tasted so foul, yet it seemed so right. could this be what it means to be a Turk? 


End file.
